Start off with a heavy fog covering Washington D.C.
Cut to immaculately dressed Conservatives, arming them selves with sharpened crosses, prayer beads strung with garroting wire and broken bottles from old sacramental wine.
The leader George the Bomber, breaks into song and dance.
Were gonna get the libssssssssss toniteeeeeeeeeee, the libs will cut and run toniteeeeeee.
Break to slovenly dressed liberals armed with sharpened roach clips, heavyweight ceramic bongs and vacuums from abortion clinics.
There leader Ted the drunken monk staggers into dance and song.
Were gonna get the consssssssssss toniteeeeeeeeeee, the cons will run to church toniteeeeeeeee.
Cut to the steps of the capitol building.
Deseted street, the two warlords from both gangs meet in the middle to discuss rules of gangwar.
The lib warlord babs the mouth Boxer asks the con warlord bill the doctor frisk "how do we do this war?
Frisk shouts sticks, Boxer shouts knives, frisk responds with guns... Boxer says now wait a minute here.
We need to sit down and talk about guns.
cut to 114 years later.
Still talking, nothing settled nothing gained."
Feel free to add to the story and change it arond some.