Your attempt at humor has failed you oh young one. Or old one. Either way you're not at your mental prime. Kinda funny how you make a light joke over something that jumps very deep into the evidence of ignorance.

Q: Anything Special I should know about Canada?
A: It is filled with Canadians, we don't know how it got that way but it just is, go figure.

A.1: Ask them what they are talking about.
A.2: Play deaf and say "What's that you say sonny (girlie, etc.), eh?"
A.3: Keep in mind people against Socialism is not funny but people for it are.
A.4: Never use the word "I" in referring to yourself it is unbecoming of a Socialist, say the word "We" instead.
A.5: Remember there are also non-Socialist Canadians, you can play where's Waldo with them.

A.6: This entire post was meant in jest but I am sure some Canadian is going to hate me for it and say plenty of things bad about the United States to which I reply "Eh? Can't take a joke? I thought those Government Officials of yours using fouler language than Dick Cheney in describing the United States very funny."

A.7: Remember to speak the international language of raising your voice until they understand you. All the cunning linguists of the world use this ploy, so if you employ it to good use you will be a cunning linguist too!!

A.8: Say hi to Jim Carey and Mike Myers (if they live there that is!!) also tell them to keep...you know what's her name...the name that can be said for it brings pain upon my ears, but safe to say it is not Alanis but the other infamous female singer from Canada.
A.9: Ask them "What is the Canadian equivalent to a Ford, Mercury, and Lincoln?"
A.10: Laugh at everyone because damn it everybody should be happy!!

- Grim X

Do you have hot and cold running water there? - In the summer (July 15-31), yes.

Indoors plumbing? - Yeah, but flush twice, it's a long way to the USA.

Real coffee? - Oh Lordy, You don't know from coffee until you check out Vancouver. Some of the coffee shops are weed friendly.....

Do you "do tea"? - Are you going to Victoria? If so you *must* 'do tea' at the Empress Hotel, and I wanna see pictures. Victoria is oddly British.

Is the food edible? - Stick to poutine and you'll be fine. Lotsa sushi joints but they may be too lopopy for you.

Does anyone know how to speak English? If not should I hire a translator? - This is what I never understood aboot Americans: How come you speak normally when on TV, but in real life the American accent is much thicker? Whatever. In Quebec it is considered good form to ask "Est-ce que vous parlez blanc?" or "Ou est la plume de ma tante?" before speaking English, which was made illegal in 1977 .

Do you accept American dollars there? Yeah but they'll Je - I mean gy - I mean screw you on the exchange rate. Gene Wilder is a hero here in Canada and is featured prominently on our purple ten dollar bill.

Heating and air conditioning invented there yet? Yes, Canadians are the biggest energy consumers on the planet.

Public transportation? Will I have to talk to any Canadians if I take some? Most Canadians on public transportation are too busy talking to themselves to bother you. The 10 Hastings street car is worth the ride.

Hope this helps,
David St. Hubbins

Addendum:
Beware of Canadian Nationalist; seriously, they are a mean bunch of terrorists. What you never watched Sci-Fi's "Invisible Man or I-Man"?
Also, screwing up lines in the Star Spangled Banner in the US is acceptable or not but at least it won't kill you as it will if you screw up lines or make fun of "O Canada" in Canada. Resist the temptation to do so.
Never write to the Quebec Government expecting that letters back to you will be in English, instead it will be in French.

That is all.

cold water is plentiful but you have to heat the water up here.
most of the corners aren't square but most houses have plumb walls.
real coffee comes from columbia.we are one of theri mfn partners.
we do the "Y" on tuesdays, thurdays and saturdays at noon
i like the caribou the best, beavertails aren't bad.
English is still going strong, Arabic and Chinese are quickly passing the french.
American money is worthless here - try columbia - I hear they have good coffee.
We invented both heatong and air conditioning, as well as the telephone delta wing fighters and Hockey!
Canadians don't talk to strangers unless they are naked ( the strangers that is).
bye bye

Dont drink the water!

Reply By: Reiki-HousePosted: Friday, March 04, 2005Your attempt at humor has failed you oh young one. Or old one. Either way you're not at your mental prime. Kinda funny how you make a light joke over something that jumps very deep into the evidence of ignorance.

get a life moron, its called humor even if you don't laugh.

Reply By: XiozanPosted: Friday, March 04, 2005Q: Anything Special I should know about Canada?A: It is filled with Canadians, we don't know how it got that way but it just is, go figure.A.1: Ask them what they are talking about.A.2: Play deaf and say "What's that you say sonny (girlie, etc.), eh?"A.3: Keep in mind people against Socialism is not funny but people for it are.A.4: Never use the word "I" in referring to yourself it is unbecoming of a Socialist, say the word "We" instead.A.5: Remember there are also non-Socialist Canadians, you can play where's Waldo with them.A.6: This entire post was meant in jest but I am sure some Canadian is going to hate me for it and say plenty of things bad about the United States to which I reply "Eh? Can't take a joke? I thought those Government Officials of yours using fouler language than Dick Cheney in describing the United States very funny."A.7: Remember to speak the international language of raising your voice until they understand you. All the cunning linguists of the world use this ploy, so if you employ it to good use you will be a cunning linguist too!! A.8: Say hi to Jim Carey and Mike Myers (if they live there that is!!) also tell them to keep...you know what's her name...the name that can be said for it brings pain upon my ears, but safe to say it is not Alanis but the other infamous female singer from Canada.A.9: Ask them "What is the Canadian equivalent to a Ford, Mercury, and Lincoln?"A.10: Laugh at everyone because damn it everybody should be happy!!- Grim XBonus Rating: Trolling Insightful Reply | | DeleteReply By: David St. Hubbins(Anonymous User)Posted: Friday, March 04, 2005Do you have hot and cold running water there? - In the summer (July 15-31), yes.Indoors plumbing? - Yeah, but flush twice, it's a long way to the USA.Real coffee? - Oh Lordy, You don't know from coffee until you check out Vancouver. Some of the coffee shops are weed friendly.....Do you "do tea"? - Are you going to Victoria? If so you *must* 'do tea' at the Empress Hotel, and I wanna see pictures. Victoria is oddly British.Is the food edible? - Stick to poutine and you'll be fine. Lotsa sushi joints but they may be too lopopy for you.Does anyone know how to speak English? If not should I hire a translator? - This is what I never understood aboot Americans: How come you speak normally when on TV, but in real life the American accent is much thicker? Whatever. In Quebec it is considered good form to ask "Est-ce que vous parlez blanc?" or "Ou est la plume de ma tante?" before speaking English, which was made illegal in 1977 .Do you accept American dollars there? Yeah but they'll Je - I mean gy - I mean screw you on the exchange rate. Gene Wilder is a hero here in Canada and is featured prominently on our purple ten dollar bill.Heating and air conditioning invented there yet? Yes, Canadians are the biggest energy consumers on the planet.Public transportation? Will I have to talk to any Canadians if I take some? Most Canadians on public transportation are too busy talking to themselves to bother you. The 10 Hastings street car is worth the ride.Hope this helps,David St. HubbinsBonus Rating: Trolling Insightful Reply | | DeleteReply By: XiozanPosted: Friday, March 04, 2005Addendum: Beware of Canadian Nationalist; seriously, they are a mean bunch of terrorists. What you never watched Sci-Fi's "Invisible Man or I-Man"?Also, screwing up lines in the Star Spangled Banner in the US is acceptable or not but at least it won't kill you as it will if you screw up lines or make fun of "O Canada" in Canada. Resist the temptation to do so.Never write to the Quebec Government expecting that letters back to you will be in English, instead it will be in French.That is all.

ah I see someone got it! good work. also I will be hunting for the elusive liberal that fled the united states AFTER the election of BUSH. Will also have a guide to show me where the deserters and draft dodgers are housed on display in canada as HEROES FROM AMERICA

Reply By: David St. Hubbins(Anonymous User)Posted: Friday, March 04, 2005

Hope this helps,David St. Hubbins

thank you david for taking this in the spirit delivered... humor and yes victoria, empress hotel. got it, and thank you

Reply By: Dummindown(Anonymous User)Posted: Friday, March 04, 2005cold water is plentiful but you have to heat the water up here.most of the corners aren't square but most houses have plumb walls.real coffee comes from columbia.we are one of theri mfn partners.we do the "Y" on tuesdays, thurdays and saturdays at nooni like the caribou the best, beavertails aren't bad.English is still going strong, Arabic and Chinese are quickly passing the french.American money is worthless here - try columbia - I hear they have good coffee.We invented both heatong and air conditioning, as well as the telephone delta wing fighters and Hockey!Canadians don't talk to strangers unless they are naked ( the strangers

thanx... I love elk, caribou close?

Reply By: Dr. GuyPosted: Friday, March 04, 2005Dont drink the water!

hmmmmm that might be a problem, maybe ship some good usa toxin filled water there?

.7: Remember to speak the international language of raising your voice until they understand you. All the cunning linguists of the world use this ploy, so if you employ it to good use you will be a cunning linguist too!!

I am an expert at being a cunning linguist, just ask my wife.

hmmmmm that might be a problem, maybe ship some good usa toxin filled water there?

It will be less of a shock to your system.