Good to hear the cranky old hebe made it back home.

A sperm all alack and forsooth
Seeking its moment of sexual truth
And when the time came
To fulfill its life's game
It was dashed to its death on a tooth!
  

Glad your home ya old fart!

There once was a man from Nantucket,
Whose dick was so long he could suck it.
He said with a grin as he wiped off his chin,
If my ear was a cunt I would fuck it.

Thinking about you Elie, I'm so glad you're home now!


Hip, hip......

HOORAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!

I once faced my deepest of fears,
When my bowels up and reversed their gears,
I lost my smug grin,
Tried to hold it all in,
But finally shot shit out both ears.

The lass I brought home was a prize,
With an alluring set of bright blue eyes,
Her breasts, so well kept,
Were what I'd expect,
But her penis was quite a surprise.

There once was a girl from New Zealand
She'd lie on her back
tickle her crack
and piss all over the ceilin'

If LW's gonna sing, then dammit I'm gonna tell a dirty joke!

A penis said to the testicals, "We’re going to a party!"

"You fucking liar," the testicals said. "You always get in and leave us outside."

What a prick.

There was a Priest and a Nun crossing the desert on a camel one day when a terrible sand storm came. It lasted for 6 hours and when it finally cleared they were horrified to see their camel was dead. They had no food or water and the situation looked hopelss. The Priest turned to the Nun and said "Sister, seeing as we are going to die out here, can you grant me one wish?"
The Nun said "Yes Father, what is your final wish?"
"In all my years in the church I’ve never seen a pair of tits before." said the Priest. The Nun was a bit shocked but lifted her robes to show off her tits in all their glory. The Priest smiled and said "Thank you Sister."
Then the Nun turned to the Priest and said "Father, in all my years in the church I have never seen a man’s penis before. Is it alright for you to show me?" The priest happily agreed and unzipped his pants. The Nun studied it intensly. The Priest had his eyes closed and was rising to attention as the Nun touched it with fascination. The Priest said with a smile on his face, "Sister, do you know that when it’s placed in certain ~ahem~ ’areas’ it can give life?"
And the Nun looked and at him and said "WELL STICK IT UP THIS CAMELS ASS AND LETS GET THE FUCK OUTTA HERE!!!!"

double post...

Man, am I pleased to hear you're home, Elie. I hope you come charging back here with a revengence and put all these rebrobates in their places LOL

BTW Loved the limericks, everyone.

Yes! We're running riot here!    

That song is very catchy...now that I read the lyrics it's stuck in my head again.

~Zoo