My fellow Democrats in keeping with our policies of never talking about anything of substance I have ordered all democrat interns to do the following , for the following reasons.

Watch all republicans to see if you can see any with their zippers on their trousers down, we can use this to show Republicans are sexual predators or have just nasty hygiene.

Report any stains on ties that vaguely resemble blood, I am sure we can start a rumor that he or she killed someone and the administration is covering it up.

Watch carefully to make sure all Republicans are obeying the speed limits, if not we can make up something about them being lawbreaking criminals.

Be aware that if any Republicans pass gas while in session, we can either accuse them of being disrespectful to congress or using a weapon of mass destruction, IE: chemical warfare.
Watch all female member of congress to see if there are any white stains on their dresses, I am sure we can make some kind of sexual scandal out of it, after all they did it to Clinton.
This memo must be followed or we will not be able to stay in the news, since we don't actually do anything news worthy!

Howard Dean, Chairman of the Democratic National Committee.