Two and 1/2 Men---The boy, Jake, gets invited to his first boy-girl party, and is nervous because he can't dance, and is unsure about mingling with girls.

Lecherous Uncle Charlie (Sheen), to Jake's dad, whose name escapes me just now: "Well, I can talk to him....you know, give him some pointers."

Dad (emphatically): "No, I don't want you talking to him or giving him any advice."

Charlie: "Why not?"

Dad: "Because all he needs to know is how to talk to girls and dance with girls....he doesn't need to know how to choreograph a three-way!"

"The tribe has spoken" Jeff Probst from "Survivor".

"What? You're crying? There's no crying in baseball!" Tom Hanks from "A League of Their Own". A movie, I know.

"Lucy I'm Home!" from "I Love Lucy".

"Hey Froggie!" from a Saturday show with Andy Devine.

"Happy Trails to You" from Roy Rogers and Dale Evans on their Saturday Morning Mattine.

Reply By: RightwingerPosted: Saturday, December 09, 2006 Two and 1/2 Men---The boy, Jake, gets invited to his first boy-girl party, and is nervous because he can't dance, and is unsure about mingling with girls. Lecherous Uncle Charlie (Sheen), to Jake's dad, whose name escapes me just now: "Well, I can talk to him....you know, give him some pointers." Dad (emphatically): "No, I don't want you talking to him or giving him any advice." Charlie: "Why not?" Dad: "Because all he needs to know is how to talk to girls and dance with girls....he doesn't need to know how to choreograph a three-way!"

All good contributions., Nice seeing you fella.

 

MM

Reply By: TrudygolightlyPosted: Sunday, December 10, 2006 "What? You're crying? There's no crying in baseball!" Tom Hanks from "A League of Their Own". A movie, I know.

I love that line!!! too funny. I remember it so well.. the movie was just ok, but that line still stands out as one my favs.

"When my Uncle Ed got back from World War One, his mom cried for three days 'cause she could tell he hadn't been a "good boy" in France. When I get home, my mom's gonna take one look at me and chuckle for a month."-----Radar, M*A*S*H

(Nelson's at Flanders' Praiseland Christian theme park and there's a whack-a-mole game with little satans that pop up)
Nelson: There's no mallet!
Ned: Stop Satan with your faith!
Nelson: My face? You callin' me ugly?!

-- The Simpsons

(Conversation about rainbows)
Cartman: Eh. I hate those things.
Kyle: Nobody hates rainbows.
Stan: Yeah. What's there to hate about rainbows?
Cartman: Well, you know. You'll just be sitting there, minding your own business, and they'll come marching in, and crawl up your leg, and start biting the inside of your ass, and you'll be all like, "Hey! Get out of my ass you stupid rainbows!"
Stan: Cartman, what the hell are you talking about?
Cartman: I'm talking about rainbows. I hate those friggin' things!
Kyle: Rainbows are those little arches of color that show up after a rainstorm.
Cartman: Oh. RainBOWS. Yeah, I like those. Those are cool.
Stan: What were you talking about?
Cartman: Huh? Oh nothing. Forget it.
Kyle: No. What marches in, crawls up your leg---
Cartman: Nothing.
Kyle: ---and starts biting the inside of your ass?
Cartman: Nothing!

-- South Park

Ok, these aren't ONE liners, but still...